Rome wasn’t Built In a Day!

Growth Mindset comes from our willingness to put ourselves outside our comfort zone. Nothing is easy at least not as easy as staying at one place- being where we are and where we have always been.

There are lots of people who are willing to take the entrepreneural plunge out there & it was heartening to meet some of them during the TIE Start up Expo in Gurgaon last week. Buzzing entrepreneurs- some young & some not so young with stars in their eyes were talking about their wonferful ideas. Amazing elevator pitches, many worthwhile mentoring sessions and a hall full of many dreamers and some doers.  Inspiring success stories from the founders of companies which started just as some small ideas like Chayos, Biryani by Kilo ,Beer Café ,India Mart, Make My Trip.

 Loved every bit – What made these entrepreneurs tick?

How it isn’t easy?

How it isn’t for the faint hearted?

How money doesn’t mean success is guaranteed?

And a reminder that Rome wasn’t built in a day.

Lessons Worth Remembering for me & Worthwhile enough for kids – yours and mine both!

  • Go out, invest time in your learning, take more courses and read about/listen to inspiring people.
  • Your own conviction in your idea matters not the idea so much
  • There are many people with ideas but only some have the courage to go all the way.
  • Seek a mentor, accept that you can’t know it all
  • Don’t expect quick results, hard work but done smartly is only thing that works.
  • Stick to it, perseverance is the only way to success.
  • Give your dreams all you’ve got, and you’ll be amazed at the energy that comes out of you.

Walking outside my comfort zone is tough for me and I surprise myself every time the jitters push me forward towards a road less travelled. When in trouble, I sometimes curse myself for not staying put and taking it easy but what makes me go still is that i know my kids are watching. They might not see me succeed but they have to see me try at least. And it has helped as my kids are becoming thinking people, propelling themselves to grow and evolve always. Only problem is that when they are walking out of their comfort zones, the mother in me has bigger jitters & and they do that a little too often for my fragile little heart.

Rome surely wasn’t built in a day…It just was made by people who had a growth mindset.

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Kids can learn through Play whatever we dare to teach them!

“If you love your books, you tenderly put them together and then you just as tenderly find the right bookends for them”Charles Gruber , a book lover rightly said. Encourage your children to read and fall in love with books.

❤️Invest in a library, a corner or a roomfull or/ and beautiful bookends for your little ones table. However large or small space you allocate in your home for books, it must be a must.

❤️Select a few books every week with them and organise them in book organisers for easy reach.

❤️Encourage your chidlren to read more and more and tenderly put them away when finished in their designated space or bookends . Encourage them to read , to take care of their books , to organise their belongings , to do goal setting however small it might be.

❤️ Four books or seven in a week, make your kids set a goal. Make sure you do your goal setting too and you read too. Kids don’t read because they don’t want to, but because they don’t see you read.

Kids can learn through Play whatever we dare to teach them.Teach them to organsie their books, read regularly and take care of their books. Sometimes, you don’t need an entire wall of books to express you love books or define who you and your child are. A few bookends where you could change the books to be read in a week or month can also become your library. Make sure you have atleat one corner in a your home, which has books. Our website store www. lilsakos.com has many playful bookends for your little readers. Check the pictures in the gallery below. The pictures at the end of the gallery are of Mahir & Dr. Pooja Srivastava Dewan who is an amazing conscious mom for who reading to her son daily is the most sacred activity of the day. The Eiffel Tower bookend she bought has another story which is worth a read. Read her testimonial at the end of the gallery.

Saakshi Kapoor Singla

https://www.lilsakos.com/collection/playful-animal-bookends

 

Obsessions are good!

“My kids love dinosaurs! Actually they are obsessed, really  really obsessed and  they know all the dinosaur types and names”, said a Mom who loved dinosaurs too, a long long time ago!

“My daughter has an obsession for cars. She loves to collect toy cars and park them in various places in the house, some times those places are under our feet and a whole lot of household members are tripping on them always”, said another mom who is amazed at her daughter’s knowledge about different kinds of cars!

Child Development experts call obsessions like these a “Deep Intense Interest”. We educationists don’t know exactly what sparks these interests and parents often can’t think of the exact moment or event that kicked off this interest — but a lot of  children have one at some point, between the ages of two and six and for some the interest lasts further into childhood. Studies in this field have shown that the most common interests  that children show at early age is in vehicles like planes, trains, cars, action figures, super heroes, machines,  live animals, balls and dinosaurs.

For many of them, these obsessions are their first taste of mastery. They love being an expert. To have a deeper understanding of something their parent doesn’t know enough about, is awesome for them.  It makes them feel like a boss and very powerful. Kelli Chen, a known paediatric psychiatric occupational therapist is of the opinion that these deep interests and obsessions are a big confidence booster for children and help in children’s cognitive development. Many studies in this area point out that these sustained obsessions help them to develop persistence skills and result in increased knowledge,  a longer attention span and much deeper information-processing skills. In nutshell they make intense learners pretty smart and bright.  Decades of research suggest that older children with these so called obsessions and intense interests tend to be of above-average intelligence.

So let your kids develop intense interests and don’t worry about their obsessions. Encourage their need to learn more and more about their favourite topic. Help stimulate their brains by getting them books on the topic and surround their environment with things that can help them in sustaining these obsessions to learn for a long long time.

I love Dinosaurs even now,  It is one of my few intense interest obsessions that stuck right into adulthood.

Check some dinosaur themed products in available on our store!

https://www.lilsakos.com/style-story/little-dinosaur-lovers

Much Love from a Mom who has some of her own intense obsessions !

Saakshi Kapoor Singla

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Kid photo created by freepik – www.freepik.com

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Is your home stimulating ENOUGH for your kids?

Environment matters, what we say to our children matters, how we live our lives matters, how stimulating is our house for our kids matters. Everything matters …especially what we do ourselves matters …..as kids learn not so much by what we say to them but more by seeing us and what we do …they learn by imitation.

So if we read , they read. If we listen to music , they grow up into people appreciating music. We spend our time in creative pursuits , they become creative. We invest in books and are seen reading , they read. We buy things and games which stimulate , they get stimulated . We enjoy going to museums , they will take their kids to museums too.

Our homes are a Petri dish of creativity. More creative we are with how we as parents make our kids spaces meaningful and add meaningful art, games, books & stimulating decor, the more we help in our children’s unconscious and incidental learning. Lets keep giving our kids an environment that inspires and motivates and fill our home with things that matter. Check out our website http://www.lilsakos.com and instagram
ttps://www.instagram.com/lilsakos/  for stimulating products made with lots and lots of love for your precious little ones!

Time flies I am telling you …. I have been there, Time flew fast and so did my kids. Make it Count Moms & Dads. Make your Home Environment Stimulating!

Saakshi Kapoor Singla

Are you A Pygmalion Parent?

I have been hibernating…missing from this space but not from my most favourite topic about what makes kids tick and have been indulging in lots of reading and researching. Something I read today stuck on and thought it was worth sharing. Something that I have been following as a parent forever and ever without the knowledge of the fancy name it is called by in Psychological circles “The Pygmalion Effect”. 

The Pygmalion Effect is a phenomenon whereby higher expectations lead to an improvement in performance.

But why is it relevant here on a parenting site?

Turns out it is one of the key factors of raising successful and well adjusted kids.

The messages we give out during our parenting journey with our kids are the beliefs that are reinforced in their minds. Beliefs that become a blueprint for them. If the blue print is positive, our kids think themselves to be capable and work towards it. If the blue print is negative , they feel their limitations and work towards strengthening that belief in their minds. We often label our kids … sometimes these labels are good but many a times they aren’t. We label them as shy, as not good in studies, not athletic, lazy etc. And these become their reality. Our expectations form the basis of our child’s self-image. So our expectations should be high from them if we want them to perform better. High expectations does not mean we should expect our tone deaf child to become a Beethoven in future. But a belief that they will become their best versions and what makes them unique.

What we tell our kids will either help them reach success or knock them down, inflate their self esteem or deflate it and start a series of self doubting thoughts and lack of confidence. Parents attitude toward their children spills into their kids psyche and influence how they feel about themselves. Therefore it is important for us parents to continuously give out signals that are strong positive impressions. Our children doing well stems from our own unwavering belief in their ability and goodness.

Brooke Hampton’s famous quote, “Speak to your children as if they are the wisest, kindest, most beautiful and magical humans on earth, for what they believe is what they will become”, talks about this beautiful power of believing.

So are you a Pygmalion Parent?

If not, stop labeling, and make your kids believe in their strengths by having higher expectations from them & they will surprise you by performing to the best of their ability and better!

I am a Pygmalion Parent and it’s worked for me to be one… my kids are on their  individual journeys and I don’t know where will they reach. But they are sure of themselves and I continue to believe in their inherent strength and goodness! 

Hichki,Oh! That hiccup in my throat!

Hiccups are continuing since  I saw “Hichki”( “Hiccup” )the Bollywood saga about the harsh reality of the sharp divide between “have and have nots” in our society and in our schools.

Right of Children to Free and Compulsory Education (RTE Act) is being blatantly violated by private schools in our country. As per RTE Act, government should monitor whether a private school has earmarked 25 per cent of the seats for EWS students. Is that a good idea? Should be …because ideally the kind of education that our children get must not be based on the  amount of money their parents have. The schools that are true to filling these quotas are not too sure too. Teachers talk about huge challenges in having kids from various economic statuses in one class . According to them and somewhere rightfully so they feel in big size classrooms … a lot of time gets wasted to handle issues which are specific to EWS kids. And the rest of class suffers. The have and have not divide stares us in the face in these classrooms. The debate why does government not invest in making government schools better instead of forcing private schools to follow the rule continues. We live in a society which runs on money…people who don’t have the money to travel look at people who travel …..who can travel look at people who can travel to foreign lands …. people who can travel in economy to foreign lands look towards people who are occupying the  business class seats.

Ok that’s how our world works, we all work at different pace and our circumstances vary but education should not have economy and business class seats. Should it? Because when we work with children,  it doesn’t matter what seat they are sitting on,when given equal opportunity …they can do similar wonders. Every experience I have ever had with EWS children has left me wondering….. what if our ESS ( economically strong children ) had the same hunger to learn like their counterparts. And these EWS children ….they can sing, paint, draw, do math , problem solve, debate and learn at similar speeds….that also without their moms and dads stimulating their brains at home and helping them with their homework. What they lack is their ability to express themselves in English. And what a big and a very sad roadblock is that in our country.

There are lots of Hichkis in my throat since yesterday. Watch the movie to see what I mean.

Was Rani Mukerjee( Protagonist of ” Hichki”, a very talented Bollywood actress) right in saying that we all have Tourette syndrome (TS), but ours is in our brains. A societal disorder which makes our brain to hiccup and forces us to be repetitive &  stereotypical about judging people and childrens’ ability based on their economic statuses.