What did you do for someone else today darling?

Some stories touch the deepest parts of your heart. Aditi Chaudhary’s did that to mine. I had the privilege of meeting her and hearing her talk at #imaginewithcf- Parenting with courage event. I haven’t yet seen the film ‘ The Sky Is Pink’ and wanted to write this before real Aditi Chaudhary became a reel character for me.

Aditi Chaudhary with Shailaja Sen@imaginewithcf

What does losing a child mean?Even a thought of a pain like that makes me miss a lot of beats in my heart…. i don’t think any of us can ever know exactly what dies in you to have a child like Aisha and living on an edge everyday. Aditi & Narain Chaudhary’s story of courage and looking at death in it’s face and accepting the reality, making it into a life purpose of helping others and giving back…… has changed something inside me.

Snippets of Aditi’s talk that left me awe struck:

” When Aisha asked me if she would still be alive at Christmas, I told her I don’t know if anyone of us will be alive till then”. Isn’t that true how do any of us know if we will live till Christmas.

” I have started feeling achievement is a dirty word. Do we ever ask our kid- what did you do for someone today darling”? Isn’t that true how we always want our kids to succeed , success and achievement is revered in our society. Aisha has gone but her motivational talks are still inspiring many to make stem cell donations. Aditi, her mother is now a mental health worker & activist who helps people through their emotional struggles. Narain, her father still sings in fund raisers to raise money for charitable organisations.

‘We grieved the loss of her life even before she passed away. But one day we woke up and made a resolution and we said we may not have the years but we will seize the moment…We will keep her happy” . Isn’t that true , no matter how long we live, it’s the moments we seize is what counts in our well being.

 “I don’t feel like she’s gone. I have a great sense of loss but I feel a lot of gratitude. I feel blessed that I have a child like Aisha. The strife has shaped us into the people we’ve become.” We run from adversity and yet it is always the tough times that shape us into our best versions.

AND another one from Aditi’s world, which resonates with my parenting sensibilities and what I do too is I tell my kids often ” No one can tell you which colour your sky should be. You are the one who paints your own sky.”

Hats off to you Mom..

Let’s all let our kids paint their own sky…

Let’s accept our kids as their own little persons….

Let’s parent with courage …

Let’s inlcude giving back in our achievement graphs….

Let’s inspire kids to give back…

Saakshi Kapoor Singla

(Aisha was the daughter of Aditi, a mental healthcare worker and Niren Chaudhary, the president of South Asia operations of Yum Brand. She had an elder brother named Ishan Chaudhary, a music composer. She was born with an immunodeficiency disorder. When she was 6 months old, she had to undergo a bone marrow transplant as a side effect of the medical therapy following bone marrow transplant, she developed a serious illness called pulmonary fibrosis a type of condition that causes irreversible scarring of the lungs.Aisha Chaudhary was giving inspirational talks on various platforms since she was 15. She was named an INK Fellow and spoke in the 2011 and 2013 INK Conferences.Aisha was also a speaker at TEDxPune in 2013. She wrote a book called My Little Epiphanies (2015)( that got released one day before her death) which included her thoughts about life and also wanted people to know about her journey that could help others going through such hardships in life Her book, Aditi and Narain’s story has helped in awareness for Stem Cell Donations )( credit: wikipaedia)

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Saakshi Kapoor Singla

Child Development Expert / Education Consultant /Author/Entrepreneur

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