Pick Ups & Drops are not wasted efforts!

Not all parents have the privilege of having their own vehicle for pick ups and drops for their children. Not all parents even when they have the privilege, want to do the mundane job. Many children are fortunate enough to travel in school buses and get a break from their moms questioning sessions after each school day. The others are ferried in their own cars with their house help and drivers.Some of them are happier because their didi’s and bhaiya’s are like their family members, old and trusted people who dote on them. The others not so fortunate as their drivers and didi’s faces are ever changing,  who are many a times just doing a job , well done or not. Most of them have their eyes glued to their phones instead of the kids in their care, some smoking their lungs off and others enjoying some not so nice jokes with their fellows in the queue. No judgement really, but some of them look too scary to entrust our precious children with.

Being a mom who has  been there , outside in the kids collection queue for most of the last sixteen years, I have seen it all. Sometimes it has been tough and limiting and not easy to juggle work as per the pickup drop schedules of my children from school ,classes , birthdays etc. But all in all it’s been a pleasure…one because I like driving and secondly being there with them during these car rides has been the easiest and sure shot way to connect with them. It has not always been pleasant though. Sometimes I’ve hovered too much, other times the kids have been not so polite.I have had my share of some very bad days, when I have cribbed and cribbed and the trips have not always been happy. Many car rides over the years have also ended up in big fights, tears, rage and extreme emotional outbursts from both sides. My love for doing it everyday doesn’t automatically mean, my kids must have enjoyed them forever too. Being ticked off for many reasons like untied shoe laces, ruffled hair, homework questions include some not so pleasant car prison like memories.

My car has been where the most meaningful conversations with the kids have happened over the years. It’s here, where none of us have had an option out….nowhere to run , or hide from each other. With two young adults , one who is ready to fly and has finished school and the other having just an year to go. Life has been good, as we are happily bonding and are not in each others hair or critical of each other anymore.Loads of teachable  moments thereafter with me doling out life lessons and advice in earlier days of my parenting , car rides with them have now become just pure fun connecting time. My car companions have taught me a lot too. I am happy about being ticked off for skipping a red light or being caught for being condescending in my discussions  by my very independent thinking children. From discussing news, ideas ,relationships, family ties,  ted talks to daily detours to get our favourite ice creams on the way back home …its been all worth it ! And I will miss it big time soon!

( Re posting the above article from 2016, reminiscing …. after hearing from a mom who said she can not make it for our event ,” because that’s my pick up time for my girl “.

I am now a mom of college going kids , studying far far away and yes i do miss all those pick ups and drops and terribly so !

Saakshi Kapoor Singla

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Obsessions are good!

“My kids love dinosaurs! Actually they are obsessed, really  really obsessed and  they know all the dinosaur types and names”, said a Mom who loved dinosaurs too, a long long time ago!

“My daughter has an obsession for cars. She loves to collect toy cars and park them in various places in the house, some times those places are under our feet and a whole lot of household members are tripping on them always”, said another mom who is amazed at her daughter’s knowledge about different kinds of cars!

Child Development experts call obsessions like these a “Deep Intense Interest”. We educationists don’t know exactly what sparks these interests and parents often can’t think of the exact moment or event that kicked off this interest — but a lot of  children have one at some point, between the ages of two and six and for some the interest lasts further into childhood. Studies in this field have shown that the most common interests  that children show at early age is in vehicles like planes, trains, cars, action figures, super heroes, machines,  live animals, balls and dinosaurs.

For many of them, these obsessions are their first taste of mastery. They love being an expert. To have a deeper understanding of something their parent doesn’t know enough about, is awesome for them.  It makes them feel like a boss and very powerful. Kelli Chen, a known paediatric psychiatric occupational therapist is of the opinion that these deep interests and obsessions are a big confidence booster for children and help in children’s cognitive development. Many studies in this area point out that these sustained obsessions help them to develop persistence skills and result in increased knowledge,  a longer attention span and much deeper information-processing skills. In nutshell they make intense learners pretty smart and bright.  Decades of research suggest that older children with these so called obsessions and intense interests tend to be of above-average intelligence.

So let your kids develop intense interests and don’t worry about their obsessions. Encourage their need to learn more and more about their favourite topic. Help stimulate their brains by getting them books on the topic and surround their environment with things that can help them in sustaining these obsessions to learn for a long long time.

I love Dinosaurs even now,  It is one of my few intense interest obsessions that stuck right into adulthood.

Check some dinosaur themed products in available on our store!

https://www.lilsakos.com/style-story/little-dinosaur-lovers

Much Love from a Mom who has some of her own intense obsessions !

Saakshi Kapoor Singla

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Kid photo created by freepik – www.freepik.com

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