I don’t have the brakes in my feet and steering wheel in my hands anymore!

Parenting is TOUGH and BITTERSWEET in all it’s stages. But what is the toughest part of being a parent? Many would argue child birth and seeing their kids going through pain..something on which they have no control on. And that’s what I thought till I took my kids … okay not kids- my young adults for their driving lessons.

Metaphorically kids being in the driving seats is what every parent is waiting for. But literally, kids in the driving seat and you in the navigator seat means the kid is in control of his and your precious life. And that in my opinion is the scariest and toughest part of parenting.

Before every driving lesson I have to prepare , prepare hard and push myself out of my comfort zone, wear my brave armour …tell myself ….if I can teach them to talk and walk, how much difficult can this be? Parents who are in the similar stage as me … I think know what I mean. To see your child growing and blooming into a tall,handsome, pretty and confident , sure of himself or herself adult is Aaaaaaaawwwesome ….but God can’t it just end there. Do I have to go out everyday and fret and have my heart in my mouth while they take the wheel. And me doing  what? …..helplessly pressing and pushing hard to find the brake in my feet on the other side of the vehicle. And when I can’t find that brake , a difficult realisation sets in everyday ….I am now the “Navigator” and navigators are guides….controls aren’t supposed to be in their hands and feet.

Why didn’t Mr.  Henry Ford and his counterparts not think of putting the controls on both sides of the cars?

Why Why ?

The toughest part of parenting is to see your children put themselves at risk again and again with you sitting as a onlooker on the other side.  Praying hard and hoping other people on the road can see the “Learners” sign on the back of our car and have their brakes well oiled. (That reminds me, I need to put the red danger sign in the front and all the sides of the car too).

My  anxiety level keeps growing by the minute during their driving lessons. With my heart talking aloud and legs shaking I am short of screaming my lungs out, dying to take the control back. But the bullet has left the gun, my kids aren’t willing to let go the control anymore. How much ever I want them to go back being babies….it isn’t possible. They are in the driving seats now. How well or not so well they drive their cars and their lives is in their hands and my control is diminishing and soon will become zero. I am waiting patiently actually not so patiently to see them manovering their cars and lives well.

They aren’t there yet…But HOPEFULLY will be soon. With this thought…I ready myself to get into passenger side of my car everyday , give them the wheel and hold my breath and keep reminding myself ….that I am not and cannot be in the driving seat anymore!

 

 

7 Replies to “I don’t have the brakes in my feet and steering wheel in my hands anymore!”

  1. Yes, that’s the feeling I have when each day I realise that slowly I’m not going to be on the driving seat of their lives but just a navigator..Seeing them fall and rise and then fall again, hopefully to rise as responsible citizens.

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